Depravity

Dance recital ’10. Solo? Henry Mancini’s The Baby Elephant Walk. It’s funny. People laugh.

This morning caught me thinking “I wish I could be better than funny…” but that’s wrong, isn’t it? Because is there anything better than funny? I suppose that I meant more graceful, flexible, brilliant, drop-dead gorgeous, cool headed; things I could never be and was never intended to be. But are those things really better than being funny? Why is it so hard for me to come to grips with being funny rather than awe-inspiring? “The grass is always greener”? Probably. The truth is that God uses laughter for His glory as much as any of those other things, how I wish that was easier to remember. Then my silly, whiny little humanity cries out that “I don’t want to glorify God that way!” So now all that’s left is to pray that God will change my attitude and forgive me my petty frailties.

On a lighter note, here is the essay I wrote to go with the solo. Please note that the first part is completely tongue-in-cheek.

Make ‘Em Laugh

Over the years, ballet has been used to inspire people—inspire them to do great things, to cry, to love, to hope, and even to dance themselves. It is an expression of one’s self, a vibrant will within us that readily gives itself to the portrayal of emotions and significant events. Ballet forms the characters of its dancers, pushing them on to new levels of determination, teaching them to persevere through the various heart-wrenching challenges of our existence; every blister, callus, and twisted ankle bring new meaning into the life-journey of a dancer. Ballet prepares us to face the world as it changes the world itself. To the end of time ballet will continue to sculpt the existences of petty mortals, growing them and bringing them back to their emotional roots.

That said, there is really no such sinister purpose behind this piece. Henry Mancini is the brilliant composer of this lighthearted music which proves a constant delight to listen and dance to; “The Baby Elephant Walk” (which made its debut in Hapari!) seems to be an embodiment of laughter and good times. It presses no angle, no agenda and no particular moral sensibilities. You may be wondering why this music was chosen and how it pertains to the theme of I Believe; there are many possible explanations, but most truthfully, this music makes yours truly giggle. In the words of the immortal Lina Lamont (from Singing In the Rain) “If we can bring a little joy into your humdrum lives, it makes us feel as though our hard work ain't been in vain for nothing.” Enjoy!

Questing: Prologue

Over the past few months it has become increasingly evident that I do not know half as much (and half is stretching it) about God, the Bible and Calvinist/Reformed views on the these subjects as I need to. While some of the ideas are familiar to me and, for the most part make oodles of sense, if somebody questioned my beliefs pertaining to any one subject, chances are that I could not point to a specific Scripture verse and say “this is how we know.” People say things that I know to be wrong but I don’t know enough direct scripture to be able to confront them about it.


Therefore I’d like to make notes on Facebook and on here on my blog of things I need proofs of and concepts that I do not comprehend; any and all help (comments, advice, references) will be highly appreciated and after questions have been resolved I hope to post the outcomes here as well.


To be continued…

My Day and Three Half-Hearted Cheers for it. Oh Woot.

-Ah yes, it was a classic scene. The faucet spouted out water with a malicious glee, filling the overflowing sink until more water fell over the sides, splashing into a happy little puddle on the laundry room floor. Which is weird, because the faucet was definitely spouting with a malicious glee, but I cannot think of a single reason why the laundry room faucet would have something against me, though the look on my face must have been priceless, and worth any trouble that blasted faucet may have gone to in order to share it's wealth of liquid with the floor and ensure that all the dust-bunnies under the washing machine were quite soggy. The dust-bunnies under the clothes dryer turned out to have an even nastier disposition that the faucet itself, so I will leave that part to your own excellent imaginations and I hope you give that nasty faucet all the credit it deserves.

We can just forget, at present, that the reason the faucet was being nasty was that I left it running for about forty-five minutes. In fact, forget that I even mentioned it, and we'll not let the facts interfere with a good story, since it is infinitely more interesting to imagine that our laundry room water faucet has very unique properties in that it can hold a grudge. Maybe even more than one, and hopefully, I will never incur enough of it's anger again to find out just how many grudges it is capable of holding.

Needless to say, I sopped up the mess using just about every towel in the house, and for a while, the world looked pretty bright for our dog Uli. She had been the principal reason that I had turned on the water to begin with, and for a while it must have seemed as if she would not have to take a bath. Unfortunately for Uli, she was a dreamer if she thought any such thing. After a grueling battle with a water faucet of evil intent, there was no way that I would be thwarted from my original purpose, and now, despite all hardships, that darn dog is squeaky clean.

Loves to all dust-bunnies that are no longer soggy,
Triss

Reality Check

God is real.

Everything else, not so much.

Isn’t that nice?

~Triss

Get Stubborn

So about the title... It seems kind of random, but after you read the rest of the post I hope it will make more sense, keeping in mind that believing no matter what junk you are going through is a lot like being stubborn. In fact, hope is something you need to intentionally be stubborn about.

For those of you who hadn’t already guessed, I’m a bit of a C.S. Lewis fan. Even in his fantasy novels he wrote addressing at least half a million subjects that are very applicable to our everyday life. I don’t need to tell anybody that it’s getting pretty late in the year, a most people have a lot on their plate, the election went in a completely opposite direction than many of us would have liked, and this is a very easy time to get bogged down and hopeless. Getting depressed about anything and everything; America, emotions, our lives at home, homework, applications, and so many of the other complications that happen when you are trying your hardest to function productively on a daily basis is highly possible.
Well, this post is going to focus on, (yeah, I know this is gonna sound cheesy), but it’s going to focus on looking for the bright side of things and not loosing hope.

I’m not telling anyone to “stuff it”. You are real, you have real feelings, and bad or annoying things are happening to you, then the last thing you need to do is turn all fluffy and sweet and pretend like your life is sunshine and roses without thorns. There is a difference between “stuffing it” and intentionally keeping your mind on things that will uplift and inspire you. You need to keep on hoping and trusting that God knows what he’s doing with you and your future even when you don’t, because if that belief ever fails then all that is left is a shadow of a person chasing his tail and bewailing that he was ever born at all. As harsh as that sounds, it happens. But where does C.S. Lewis tie into all this?

Now I realize that Puddleglum from Lewis’ The Silver Chair isn’t exactly the first person that would come to mind when you try to think of a role model, but maybe this quote will change your mind. A quick catch up in the book: Jill, Eustace, Puddleglum, and the Prince, are in the underworld, where the witch is trying to convince them that there is no Narnia, no sun, no Aslan. Nothing but her dark domain, she has been pretending that they are dreamers, playing childish games, she almost has them convinced and feeling more than a little hopeless…


“But Puddleglum, desperately gathering all his strength, walked over to the fire. Then he did a very brave thing. He knew it wouldn’t hurt him quite as much as it would hurt a human; for his feet (which were bare) were webbed and hard and cold-blooded like a duck’s. Bus he knew it would hurt him badly enough; and so it did. With his bare foot he stamped on the fire, grinding a large part of it into ashes on the flat hearth. And three things happened at once. First, the sweet heavy smell grew very much less. For though the whole fire had not been put out, a good bit of it had, and what remained smelled very largely of burnt Marsh-wiggle, which is not at all an enchanting smell. This instantly made everyone’s brain far clearer. The Prince and the children held up their heads again and opened their eyes.
Secondly, the Witch, in a loud, terrible voice, utterly different from all the sweet tones she had been using up till now, called out, ‘What are you doing? Dare to touch my fire again, mud-filth, and I’ll turn the blood to fire inside your veins.’
Thirdly, the pain itself made Puddleglum’s head for a moment perfectly clear and he knew exactly what he really thought. There is nothing like a good shock of pain for dissolving certain kinds of magic.
‘One word, Ma’am,’ he said, coming back from the fire; limping, because of the pain. ‘One word. All you’ve been saying is quite right, I shouldn’t wonder. I’m a chap who always liked to know the worst and then put the best face I can on it. So I won’t deny any of what you said. But there’s one thing more to be said, even so. Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things –trees and grass and sun and moon and starts and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones. Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. And that’s a funny thing, when you come to think of it. We’re just babies making up a game, if you’re right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow. That’s why I’m going to stand by the play-world. I’m on Aslan’s side even if there isn’t any Aslan to lead it. I’m going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn’t any Narnia. So, thanking you kindly for our supper, if these two gentlemen and the young lady are ready, we’re leaving your court at once and setting out in the dark to spend our lives looking for Overland. Not that our lives will be very long, I should think; but that’s small loss if the world’s as dull a place as you say.”


Puddleglum wasn’t particularly strong, or smart, or anything. But he believed with a fire that would not be quenched by anything. He trusted that Aslan was the right, and knew that the witch could only be wrong. His belief and trust made the turning point for the rest of the book. He led the children and the Prince to safety, because he didn’t loose faith.

Sure, you might say, he’s a character in a book. Point conceded, he is just a character in a book. But people, real people, C.S. Lewis himself, faced some pretty terrible stuff. Death, heartbreak, atheism, blood. In fact, if you read Lewis’ biography, you’ll see, he wasn’t just some idyllic smart guy who sat elevated above all the pain and horror of this earth. He faced more than his share of hopelessness and grief. But at one point in his life, he chose to believe no matter what, and just look how that decision has impacted literally millions of lives.

A favorite song of mine, I Believe in Love, by Barlow girl, says,
“I believe in the sun, even when it’s not shining. I believe in love, even when I can’t feel it! I believe in God, even when He is silent! I believe!”
It may seem like I keep harping on that belief thing, believing that God will pull you through no matter what, but if you don’t have that hope, even if you owned the world, you wouldn’t have anything. Think about it.

Hanging in there,
~Triss

Keeping Up with My Vehicle Factory Warranty

Ok, as hard as this is to admit, I am really bad about keeping up with my vehicle factory warranty. To tell the truth, I have ignored at least four second notices that it has run out. Since the company has only called me about four times, then I assume that there is something wrong with my phone, obviously I keep on missing the first warning. I’m not entirely sure whether they just automatically re-up me or not, because I haven’t answered and they keep on calling.

I know I ought to be better about this; you would be surprised to know just how many thumb bicycles are stolen or crashed every year. Also, they have lousy transmissions. So I know that I should be more careful about this and not rely on the company to just charge my account.

We as Americans often take these warranties for granted. We assume that the companies will give up on us ever responding to their notices, and take care of the problem themselves. But when we do so, we risk so much, just think of all the awful catastrophes just waiting to pounce on our thumb bikes and leave our poor thumbs in the lurch, without any transportation; Having to rely solely on all the other body members to get them to their yoga class. Don’t have a thumb bike? Well don’t forget that your ring finger has a football game to attend as well. It is always important to make sure our fingers get enough exercise in this day and age when fast-food is predominant.

Your fingers aren’t involved in sports you say? Well do yourself a favor and don’t vote for Obama, who is trying to finalize a law saying that Water Buffalos should count as vehicles, much to the chagrin of the Society for Animal Prevention or SAP, (not SACP, since the cruelty part has become a given) and therefore must have individual warranties.

It is a well known fact that everybody has a Water Buffalo.

Anti-Stress Attitude

I don't have much to write today that will be of any consequence to any but myself. It's almost midterm, and it will be amazing if anyone has the time enough to read this post, but I wanted to post this verse anyways.

Hear my cry, O God;

Attend to my prayer.

From the end of the earth I will cry to You,

When my heart is overwhelmed;

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

For You have been a shelter for me,

A strong tower from the enemy.

I will abide in Your tabernacle forever;

I will trust in the shelter of Your wings.

Selah

Psalm 61:1-4

One of the reasons I chose this verse is to remind us that God is a higher rock, He isn't going to move or be budged, and we have the assurance that He will always love us and take care of us.

The other reason is this; I have wondered, sometimes whether, when king David says "I will" do something, he might not be trying to assure himself that he would do it more than anything else. Because, as neat a dude as David was, anyone who reads the Psalms can see how very human he was. To trust in the shelter of God's wings is easier said than done. Yeah, you try it for a day, for a whole day, and kudos to you if you can fully trust in God for more than half of it without a single doubt or worry.
Maybe David is having some doubts too, and is trying to talk himself out of them, turning his mind from the possibility of failure, which, with God's help can't really happen, on the other hand, there are many definitions of said. Not only that, but by swearing to do so, he was held accountable by God. Fortunately for him, God is merciful.

I think too often, the failure that we, as Christians, are worried about, is one that might be caused by our failing to hear God correctly. Man, that's tough, how do we know whether it is God we are hearing, as apposed to our own imaginations? But God is a higher rock, He prepared for all eventualities, and even knows what we shall do before we do it, be it following Him and trusting Him completely, or sometimes going the wrong way. We can't fail, we can mess up, yes, and we need to try to be better, but God will love us even when we do mess up.

We need to trust in God, more than we trust in the "possibility" of failure. To set our minds on what we have to do, but remember that what we have to do, we have to do it trusting God. Remember that our failures can only be that by the world's standard, and nothing that will really kill us. On hard days we need to think, "I will do this, what've I got to loose, He'll love me anyways."

~Triss